i believe in auburn and am obsessed with it...

what a year it's been to be at auburn: an undefeated season, a heisman trophy winner, and a supply of memories to last a lifetime. it's been a few months since i've blogged so decided it was about time. when i thought through everything that my semester has entailed, i was a bit overwhelmed. it seems the recurring themes have been patience and trust. God has continued to abundantly bless me in countless ways. i am so undeserving yet He showers His unconditional love upon me. what a mighty God we serve!

football has always been something that's close to my heart, but this year that jumped to a whole new level! after every home game i would tell my friends and family "that had to be the best game yet"...it just kept getting better! with all the hype of winning in the air and the spirit of unity that exists only in auburn, what's not to love?! i feel blessed to be a part of a school that goes beyond academics, beyond simply games, and truly is a community that experiences life together! through seeing our team perform on the field, mentor in the classroom, and serve those around them, i realized once more auburn truly is a place like none other. it amazes me that i can temporarily call it home! god totally had his hand in placing me on the plains and there could not be a better college for me. i have friends better than i could have dreamed of, love what i am studying, and literally get chills when i pull back into town after any stint away! even my family has picked up on it and my mom's new favorite phrase is war eagle!! what can i say, it's contagious!

this semester i've also experienced true teaching for the first time. all of my classes are directly related to the classroom and my future career which i love! i've rekindled my love for children's books (my latest favorite: pinkilicious), had the most hilarious learning moments, and seen what it means to truly impact a life. i've witnessed everything from students performing raps and having dance contests to transition from identifying two letters to full letter recognition! although i've seen that teaching will be much harder than i ever realized, i've also discovered that it will be more rewarding than i could imagine! educating future generations is such a privilege and huge responsibility but holds such a special place in my heart. i'm excited to continue diving into it.

the lord has been so evident in my life this semester, maybe even more than ever before. he has worked so many things together for his good as i could never predict. i am continuously amazed by who our lord is and constantly challenged to be still and know. if i believe HE is God, i must believe He has it in control! so often i can't seem to control certain parts of my life...in these moments, i see my great need for Him and that i'm not meant to. i am such a planner and i want to know what my future will look like and where it will take me...the Lord has reminded me that it's not my job to map out my life but only to be patient and see where He takes me. proverbs 19:21 says "many are the plans in the heart of a man, but it is the lord's purpose that prevails". this verse has brought me to my knees on countless occasions this semester because i find myself clinging so closely to my desires and plans but knowing that i must submit and trust that the Lord will once more prove true. He holds me close and reminds me of that so often.

i've had the opportunity to dig into david platt's "radical" this semester. talk about a challenging read. our culture truly reflect this "american dream ideal" that is so unhealthy and un-bibilical. through a number of contributing factors i have seen that this is not at all something that i want. i think it is so easy to get caught up in needing the next new thing and living as society deems appropriate...this is such an empty lifestyle. i want my life to be marked by something different. i want to stand out because my faith affects my life that dramatically. i want to live as the bible says and not as i interpret it. i want to give more; i want to serve more; i want to love more. i want to be more consumed by the Lord and let that define me. boy do i have a long way to go!

what a semester...and to try to sum it up in a few brief paragraphs. as i write and reflect these are the things that stick out to me. i have continued to prize the relationships i'm surrounded by and constantly brag that i have the best friends in the world! God has taught me so much, and i know i still have a ton to learn...i look forward to what lies ahead. for now all i can say is war cam eagle, time to go duck hunting :)

africa is full of heart...

three years ago i went on a trip that i think will forever help mold my journey. i was blessed to travel to nairobi, kenya and serve in a variety of ways. from playing with children who had never experienced love to building a place of worship for a community that had never enjoyed a place to gather together to praise our awesome God, africa impacted me and forever stole a piece of my heart. at times my heart is overwhelmed by my time there, other times I become numb to the pain and poverty i experienced. the question i continue to ask myself: what is my role? what is my response?

these questions were especially stirring in my heart today because of a dear friend of mine, laurin sanders, who travelled to nairobi this summer with mocha club. her experience parallels mine so closely, it blew my mind a bit. she visited most of the same places, met some of the same people, and felt very similar emotions all along the way. she kept a blog while there that perfectly recounts each day and just hit home in my heart: the highlights, the horrors, and everything in between. it’s a great read: http://laurinms.blogspot.com/.

in her blog she speaks of the dire circumstances but amongst this the undeniable joy of the people. kenyans have more joy than anyone i’ve ever met. despite the fact that they don’t know if or where their next meal will come from or if they will even live to see tomorrow, they thank God for his faithfulness and praise Him with all they have. this is exactly why I returned to the states excited to make a difference. my team was comprised of my very best friends from high school. with passionate hearts we returned, ready to make a difference. it brought tears to my eyes as i read of laurin’s experiences at the Emmanuel School, a product of our passion. our high school came together to raise money for these precious children of kibera, and here it is making a difference and impacting not only these kids, but other americans who will respond in their own way. God is so faithful and certainly works all together for good!

habbakuk 1:5 says, “look among the nations, and see; wonder and be astounded. for I am doing a work in your days that you would not believe if told.” i believe that God is doing huge things in this land that has captured my heart, and i am waiting expectantly to see as more and more of those play out. i am honored that God allowed me to experience the joy and the lessons of Kenya. i long to go back!

as i gear up for another year at auburn, i’m elated. God so perfectly prepares my heart for exactly where I’ll be. With this renewed passion and vision for this incredible nation, i am excited to continue raising awareness through mocha club. just today i thought about the countless conversations I will be having during the week of rush. instead of letting these be wasted opportunities, i can use these stories to help promote something of eternal value. I continue to pray that the Lord will use me and stir me to His callings. that my selfishness would not get in the way of an opportunity for furthering His kingdom. that instead of establishing my own plans i be obedient to His. that my heart “be amped for the Lord” no matter where i am (as our kanakuk theme song declared). that my heart be burdened for these people who taught me so much. that my life and time in franklin or auburn or wherever i find myself, would be helping promote significant change in kenya :)

relaxation. retreat. radiance.

that is what the lake is to me! relaxation: the place i feel more at ease and carefree than anywhere in the world. retreat: the place that is a sanctuary away from the fast-paced society of which i'm a part. radiance: the place i constantly see God's glory pouring forth: from the hand-painted skies to the perfect flowing currents, His goodness astounds me.

my week departure from real life down to smith lake with my mom served as the perfect transition from kamp-mode to reality. essentially, it was the polar opposite of kamp in that i lazed around, had no schedule, and no one to attend to. it was such a change that i often found myself longing for the kountryside! i would constantly recount details and stories to mom or look at the time and picture what i would be doing at kamp. what a change in such a few days. God's faithfulness continued to appear in His constant meeting with me, his continuous challenges, and His answer to prayers. He is so overwhelmingly magnificent. in the quiet of the lake i could experience God's presence so much. i once again realized the enormous blessings he bestows upon me: from His beauty to my precious family! i have the best parents in the world who love me ridiculously well :) what a perfect place the lake is: eliminating all distraction and displaying God's majesty! i could stay forever.

where wonder began...

"in the chaos, in confusion...i know you're sovereign still" as i sang these words in church this morning, my mind couldn't help but wander back to the kountryside! spending the summer constantly surrounded by kiddos is certainly my momentary definition of chaos. yet it was perfect chaos where God was certainly sovereign and totally dominant. i don't think a place like k-kountry exists anywhere else in the world: a place where you are totally free to be exactly who God created you to be; a place where Jesus rules and satan is banished; a place where a sweaty shirt is prized because it means you're hype enough; a place where giving of yourself means literally pouring out everything you've got so kids might glimpse Jesus more; a place where all things of the world are totally stripped away; a place where relationships of a lifetime are built in a week; a place of complete honesty, complete brokenness, and complete freedom; a place where the entire staff is recklessly abandoned to the will of the Lord. did i really just spend my summer in this place?! it sounds too good to be true.

i hadn't heard of a "moment of wonder" until i reached the kountryside: a moment that takes your breath away and leaves you in awe of what you've just experienced. thinking back on these past two months, i have countless M.O.W's :) from barn 1 love during staff training to riding segways on my last night in branson, a day didn't pass without at least a few of these moments. seeing kids introduced on opening day to a hundred screaming college kids who are being ridiculous so that child feels loved; watching girls hearts break as their "best friend" and favorite puppet bummer has been stolen by evil villains; tucking girls in at night and praying for their families at home and this missing puppet; seeing these same girls do everything they can to defeat those villains and rescue that puppet; watching girls minds be blown as they stare into rachel's eyes as she places them in a tribe; putting on an inflatable tube and fighting kids so they can experience japanese sumo wrestling; jumping up and down for hours to worship the Lord with 200 krazy hype kampers; winning a synchronized bart-ball competition and having girls say it was the highlight of their day; seeing a helicopter land 50 feet in front of me and being just as amazed as my kampers; riding G-Force and laughing harder than anyone...and then comforting the tears it brought; catching crawdads despite my hate of bugs; tubing in water colder than ice; letting 8 year olds do my makeup and hair for a pageant; having those girls tell me "that was the best thing ever" after my pageant performance; having a precious child tell me they want to accept jesus and walking them through this...then getting to walk them to ring the bell and letting them boldly declare it; being sung to and celebrated on my birthday like never before; riding the waterslides 17 times on my birthday and my girls commenting "this has to be the best birthday ever"...they were right; making friends that will be in my wedding; being able to turn to my co and smile because of how amazing it all is; doing all of this because of God's inconceivably great plan and for His eternal glory.

k-kountry was the perfect place for me to spend my summer. it challenged me more than i could imagine: from homesick kampers who cried for 8 days of kamp to girls who couldn't seem to comprehend what kindness meant; from changing wet sheets to cleaning up throw-up; from unending patience to supernatural energy only of the Lord; from knowledge of Him to scripture memorization...God challenged me in huge ways. yet He promises to be faithful and he met these challenges with aide and taught me so much more than i could've ever imagined. on the first night of kamp i wrote that i was expectant of big things because i had experienced them before; i thought my first summer couldn't be surpassed...God did something huge because this summer was even better: i learned more, loved more, was stripped of more, and was more sad to leave than ever before. the kountryside is an incredible place where growth is inevitable and lifelong friendships begin. it's the place that taught me to experience the wonder of what surrounds me: the people, the circumstance, the creation, the lessons, and most importantly the LORD!

"this God--His ways are perfect. the word of the Lord proves true. He is a shield for those who take refuge in Him" ~psalm 18:30