This is Kibera.

Sewage filled pathways. Rancid smells that stop you in your tracks. Barefoot babies running amongst this. Burning heaps of trash. Houses the size of my bedroom holding families of 10. Homes made of aluminum and mud. Countless kiddos echoing a chorus of “How are youuu?” as we pass by because it is the only English they know. Children taking care of children. Heartbreak and heartache every moment. This is Kibera.

A wide open dirt field with room to run and play. A colorful jungle-gym for the itty-bitties. Classrooms full of bright young students. Teachers full of wisdom. Teachers so ready to love even when that calls for tough love. Students spending from 6:30 AM to 6 PM in school with such drive to one day attend “university”. Jesus’ light shining forth from every single face. This too is Kibera.

Today we returned to Kibera, the largest slum in East Africa and second largest in the world. Over one million people live in one square mile of land. It is typically portrayed as a hopeless, drug-filled, and terrifying place. However, the side we experienced today held such joy. As we walked the streets, or paths rather, into the very middle of the slum, the images I first referenced were all we saw. My heart continuously broke as I saw more and more faces of desperation. The whole time I was praying and wondering how I reconcile that world with my own; the only difference between me and someone living in Kibera is where I was born…why God? He instilled in me a sense of peace and hope that this is why I am here: to come and see and then go and tell. Just as His word demands. I cannot see and experience what I have and sit idly by. I must share what I have seen…I must make whomever I encounter envision the poverty I was surrounded by today but then, more than anything, see the hope that abounds. When we passed through the gates of Silanga School, everything changed. Within this chaos we had just experienced, here existed an almost utopia-like establishment. It was not significantly nicer than the other places, however it had such clear purpose: to educate the children of Kibera and create the best future possible to every child who passes through their gates with a foundational Biblical education. It was truly incredible! We got to see all aspects of the school: the preschool section, the high school, the Compassion International partnership, and the Childcare Ministry. I of course loved the preschool and was so impressed by the curriculum, which is far ahead of American standards for that age. The precious children were loving all they had the opportunity to learn. The high schoolers were similar as they were filled with such clear determination and drive. Failure isn’t an option; education is the crucial necessity to create and enable a future for themselves. The teachers of Silanga were equally as amazing: they were almost all college-educated professionals who returned to the slum by choice to provide a hope and future for this next generation of children. Hope illuminates their faces. After having the opportunity to see these kids academic lair, we also got to play with them during their break! Some of the “Form 1” aka freshmen girls were double-dutching like nobodies business. They asked me to join them and boy did I try hard to jump my little heart out, but my best efforts didn’t compare! I had such fun attempting though. Silanga held such hope amidst utter poverty; it was an encouraging place to spend the day pouring into these kiddos!

Another aspect of today that brings my heart joy is the difference in Kibera since I was last here four years ago. Walking through then, I was not only shocked by what I saw and completely heartbroken, but I left feeling both helpless and hopeless. There did not appear much promise. Walking through today was a totally new feeling: the sewage was much less, the smell better, the people happier…as Pastor Benson and I discussed the change, he told me, “There is much good coming to Kibera. A new generation is rising up and making it a better place to live for themselves. There is much hope; there is much promise.” Truly, there is hope and promise! Kibera today has come so far in four short years; our God never ceases to amaze me!

A few shout-out moments:

• Bets: in the London airport, I had to run through and the moving sidewalks really helped…of course I thought of you; talk about efficient!
• Kak: there was a 2 story Harrods in the London airport, enough said.
• Bekah: yesterday there was a dance party with the African women, I needed you here!
• La: tonight we ate at a Chinese restaurant in Kenya; turned out better than your Italian Chinese experience!
• Mommy: seeing the plaque of the school you and the FF women had built made me so proud to be your daughter!
• LG and Sas: 3 days, enough said!

The Adventure Truly Begins

Happy day of Independence from Kenya! Today was a “National Holiday”, basically their 4^th of July! There wasn’t too much celebration but there sure was a lot of relaxing and enjoyment to fill the day. Today we traveled to a local park and arboretum. It was one of the most beautiful parks I have ever been to; in the middle of this crazy city are these exotic trees and lush wildlife. We went to celebrate the “HEKO” project which is one of Mocha Club’s HIV/AIDs projects which focuses on prevention, treatment, and counseling. This was a field-day of sorts for the 300 HEKO members that came out to join us. It was a sweet time to truly share life with these men, women, and children. A few stories stuck out above the rest so I’ll share those with y’all!

When we first arrived we were invited to participate in “exercise” with these groups. I was grabbed by one of the women, Jane Akinyi who I soon came to know and love, and asked to lead her group in this time. Next thing I knew, I was leading 30 middle-aged women in any and all exercises I could think of. It was as if Jillian Michaels came to Africa but I was Jillian…talk about a time to laugh! At first I started with basic stretches and jumping jacks but as I found out I had thirty minutes to fill, I ventured into push-ups and bicycle crunches. Laying in the dirt surrounded by hysterical laughter from these beautiful women was something I will probably never forget! They have such zest for life amidst all adversity. Jane later shared her testimony with our group, and I was so challenged by it: she told us she had been diagnosed HIV+ and was in a coma for over 3 months. Her family had pretty much given up hope. She has two children who are now in college and one elementary aged daughter; they would have been left orphans with nowhere to turn. Somehow, it truly sounds like a miracle to me, Jane was revived and given another chance at life. She praises God for this and has chosen to give back by serving as a counselor for HEKO where she helps women in similar situations. Before Jane shared her testimony, no one would have ever guessed her health situation; she was leading worship and just joyful beyond belief. Jane exemplifies what it means to not let circumstance define happiness and the blessing it is to serve those you are surrounded by. She left an impression on my heart and taught me so much more than I could imagine. I hope to one day be like Jane Akinyi.

Another story that captured my heart was that of three young boys. These boys, Eric, Henry, and Luca, were shy at first but soon opened up to us. One of my favorite questions to ask the Kenyan children is what they want to be when they grow up. Their hope and faith is unwavering; they have truly incredible dreams for their lives that both they and I pray become their reality. Eric wants to be a doctor; Henry an engineer; and Luca a pilot. What hope lies in this next generation! They need leaders like these boys will one-day be. Later, they asked me why we were here. I responded because of Jesus. Eric told me, “That is very good. I go to church and love it.” When I asked him why, he thought for a moment and then answered, “Because I love God’s Word and love learning about it.” I thought about it and decided to venture out and ask if he had a favorite verse; without skipping a beat, he quoted Acts 1:8, “You will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you and you will be my people in Jerusalem and in Judea and Samaria and to the ends of the Earth”. What a perfect reminder of why I’m here! All power and strength comes from the Lord; He has demanded and called witnesses and disciples to the ends of the earth. What an opportunity to make His name known and celebrate with fellow believers in this! All praise be to Him.

Travel Woes…

After 52 hours of traveling, I finally arrived to my favorite continent! Never had I imagined it would be such a process and trial just to get here. 24 predicted hours of travel was intimidating enough, but when that time actually more than doubled, I did not even really know what to do with myself! I feel like God was definitely giving me a new lesson in patience and perseverance. I didn’t know I needed a ton of work in these areas, but now I’m thinking differently!

I was overzealous and eager for my 2 o’clock flight out of Nashville, so of course we arrived at the airport at 11:30 AM. Little did I know I wouldn’t leave Nashville til 4:15 (not gonna lie, BNA isn’t the most exciting airport). Although that already caused me to miss my connection to London, I had hope because there were a number of other flights to London out of Chicago that night. I had one more chance to still make my Nairobi connection and if that failed, at least I could spend my extra day in London. Well no, no, no, God had other plans! Because of bad weather in Chicago, instead of going into a gate upon arrival, we sat on the tarmac (aka the windy roads surrounding the airport) for 3.5 hours. So, I watched every one of those London flights taxi by me and then take off without me. Talk about a helpless feeling! Needless to say, by the time I got off that first plane (6 hours later after it was supposed to be an hour flight), I was emotionally drained. I then ran through the airport trying to catch my final option to London only to come about 10 minutes short. So, Chicago for the night. Not too bad, but again the process of hurry up and wait continued. I had to wait for my baggage for an hour and then spent another hour in line reconfiguring my ticket situation. But alas, I was put on the plane for the next day and found myself a hotel room for the night (talk about feeling like a big girl). Monday I made my way back to the airport and had a few hours to kill so became an O’Hare pro. By the time 6 o’clock rolled around I couldn’t be happier to finally be London-bound. It was a good flight that arrived on-time allowing me enough time to catch my Nairobi connection! However, American Airlines had failed to confirm my ticket so I had a scare that I wouldn’t make it again. They got it worked out though, and I made it on the flight! Thank goodness for British Airways having their life more together…finally, I was destined for Africa!! I arrived at 10 PM Kenya time and had to get my Visa and luggage and make it through customs before finally joining my Mocha Club team! Talk about a long day (or days I guess)!

My favorite part of this journey, besides the lessons learned, was the diversity of culture I experienced. From O’Hare to Heathrow, I have never had my life collide with so many people from such different walks of life. From the lines I stood in to the hotel I stayed in and finally back to the waiting at the gate, I became good friends with men and women from England, Israel, Russia, and Kenya. My highlight friend was the bishop of Mombasa, Kenya’s second largest town. Although it was a draining experience, I absolutely loved and am happier than ever to finally be here! Thanks for your prayers…stay tuned for the adventures which await me!

Anxious Anticipation

“You Americans come with your laptop computers, malaria medicine, and little bottles of hand sanitizer and you think you can change the outcome, huh?” Danny Archer, Blood Diamond. If you haven’t seen it, you should. Re-watching this was quite the introduction to my time in Africa… a dramatization of the war within Sierra Leone for diamonds; a dramatization of some of the conflict that still exists in this continent; a dramatization of the story of one American who had hopes that her voice could rock the world. The fore mentioned items are some things I just finished putting on my packing list, along with hopes that not I, but Christ in me might change this world I’m about to enter. However there is still so much unknown that I am about to walk into. So many Americans go with hopes of making an impact; I’m no different. Yet somehow, I feel this call stronger than ever and am thrilled for what lies ahead. I hope that I will not be “That American” but rather be humbled myself so that Christ might work through me.

As my journey looms ever closer, both my excitement and my nerves grow. I am about to spend my summer in Africa: with the opportunity to love the least of these, to pour out of myself like never before, to live exactly as the Word says to; what more could I want? Soon after, these thoughts follow: I am about to spend my summer in Africa: essentially on my own, possibly without running water, perhaps with little communication to anyone else, certainly apart from what I know and am comfortable with. What have I gotten myself into?!

In my mind, I want to see a fairytale: the Africa that I’ve heard about; orphans being loved and Jesus being made famous. This is the Africa I want to be a part of. Yet I know it will probably not be. My parents like to quote a pastor friend of theirs who claims, “There is so much wrong in Africa. And yet, there is so much right.” I know I am about to encounter a lot of right mixed in with a lot of wrong. My innocent, protected, naïve self will have to step up to the plate and evaluate for myself what is right and in line with scripture and what is not. I am just one person and don’t have the power to change a continent, but yet I am one person and do have God with me. He will equip me as He calls me, of this I am confident. So I prepare to embark on what I know will be the summer of a lifetime, with excitement and nerves, with anxious anticipation, with a heart ready to be changed by the God I so dearly love! 7 days and counting…

i had plans, He had purpose.

as summer quickly approaches, i think back on the journey the Lord took me on to get here...it has been so perfectly orchestrated, and what makes it even better is that i had no idea what he was planning for me. my heart is truly overwhelmed. proverbs 19:21 states, "many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the lord's purpose that prevails." this verse has guided me through so many things this year. i love the distinction it makes between the plans of man verses the purposes of the Lord. purpose is so much greater than plan. here's a little glimpse into how my summer came together:

since my freshman year of college, i had dreamed of studying abroad this summer...God dreamed bigger and let my international experience correlate with my heart's greatest passion: african missions. as the fall began and the song "you said" by shane&shane continuously played in my life; God had purpose. God was intentional as the verses pslam 96:3 and 2:8 repeatedly came to mind and left my heart challenged. as i read david platt's radical and was confronted with the opportunity to give away more of myself than i had ever dreamed, God was planting seeds. as my heart swelled to the fact that our God is the God of nations while at Passion 2011, God was tying together my future. as my sister left to spend the year in Uganda, and i longed to go with; God was establishing my own unique path. as the planning of my trip began, i foresaw myself raising support to enable the journey; God had already planned for funding to come from my beloved university through a generous scholarship. as i tried to decide what african country i would end up in, God perfectly guided me to exactly where He wanted: 3 in fact. as i toyed with the idea of going on a mocha club trip, God swung open the door and then invited me deeper. and as i now have a month to go, God is continuing to teach me so much about his perfect plans that have such purpose.

i am about to embark on what i think will be the summer of a lifetime. i will spend two weeks in kenya with the mocha club visiting their various projects. i'm excited to see the actual product of a growing connection between auburn and africa. i will then travel to polokwane, south africa where i will spend five weeks with eagles nest christian school. i will get the opportunity to work with the young school children and assist in both local and international missions efforts.

so here i go...away from everything i know and all that is comfortable to me. here i go...knowing i have so much ahead of me to learn. here i go, with zeal and passion but also unsure of the unknown. here i go...trying to follow the instructions of psalm 96:3 in which the Lord proclaims, "declare my glory among the nations and my marvelous works to all the peoples!" so here i go...seeking to carry His name.

convicted. challenged. changed.

it all points to Jesus. i've just returned from an incredible week at passion 2011 where i got to experience the presence and glory of the Lord like never before. and what i loved most? it wasn't about the speakers (although they were phenomenal in speaking the truth of the Word), it wasn't about the worship leaders (although they glorified the Lord by using their gifts so perfectly), nor was it about an event or a gathering...it was completely about one thing: JESUS!

how quickly do i carry the names of various things forth in my life? and yet, how little is that name Jesus? i'm better at selling the name of Mocha Club or Auburn or sparkle TOMS than i am at selling the name and renown of my savior-Jesus! that is a shame. that must change. i'm overwhelmed at all i learned and experienced. i'm convicted and challenged in the best ways. i'm changed forever.

living without proclaiming the gospel is no longer an option. boldness is a necessity. it's something i'm terrified of, yet something i have total confidence in God for. i can't compete with Jesus for who should be my foundation--it should always be Him! i can't escape all temptation, but i can learn how to curtail it and stop imminent sin before it occurs. i can't continue living in such comfort and separation while so many suffer. i can't keep reading books like "radical" and "crazy love" and still foresee my life as so american-dream-like. i must make changes. my life must reflect something greater. i must carry the one name that matters: JESUS!

one more thing the Lord revealed to me clearer than ever before is that He is truly and fully the God of the NATIONS! i was overwhelmed by this reality a number of times this past week and really the past semester. i'm not sure what this new-found burden on my heart means, but i'm excited to see what the Lord will do! it caused me to realize how much i have limited our limitless creator and how much greater He is than i could ever realize. students in kampala, uganda; paris, france; and throughout china are boldly declaring Jesus as Lord and lifting up His name. He is the God of so many cities and has so much more to do in each place. may we not be blinded by our own worlds but be drastically exposed and collided with these incredible things happening in, through, and for our God!

"yes Lord, walking in the way of your truth, we wait eagerly for you, for your NAME and your RENOWN are the desires of our souls" isaiah 26:8

i believe in auburn and am obsessed with it...

what a year it's been to be at auburn: an undefeated season, a heisman trophy winner, and a supply of memories to last a lifetime. it's been a few months since i've blogged so decided it was about time. when i thought through everything that my semester has entailed, i was a bit overwhelmed. it seems the recurring themes have been patience and trust. God has continued to abundantly bless me in countless ways. i am so undeserving yet He showers His unconditional love upon me. what a mighty God we serve!

football has always been something that's close to my heart, but this year that jumped to a whole new level! after every home game i would tell my friends and family "that had to be the best game yet"...it just kept getting better! with all the hype of winning in the air and the spirit of unity that exists only in auburn, what's not to love?! i feel blessed to be a part of a school that goes beyond academics, beyond simply games, and truly is a community that experiences life together! through seeing our team perform on the field, mentor in the classroom, and serve those around them, i realized once more auburn truly is a place like none other. it amazes me that i can temporarily call it home! god totally had his hand in placing me on the plains and there could not be a better college for me. i have friends better than i could have dreamed of, love what i am studying, and literally get chills when i pull back into town after any stint away! even my family has picked up on it and my mom's new favorite phrase is war eagle!! what can i say, it's contagious!

this semester i've also experienced true teaching for the first time. all of my classes are directly related to the classroom and my future career which i love! i've rekindled my love for children's books (my latest favorite: pinkilicious), had the most hilarious learning moments, and seen what it means to truly impact a life. i've witnessed everything from students performing raps and having dance contests to transition from identifying two letters to full letter recognition! although i've seen that teaching will be much harder than i ever realized, i've also discovered that it will be more rewarding than i could imagine! educating future generations is such a privilege and huge responsibility but holds such a special place in my heart. i'm excited to continue diving into it.

the lord has been so evident in my life this semester, maybe even more than ever before. he has worked so many things together for his good as i could never predict. i am continuously amazed by who our lord is and constantly challenged to be still and know. if i believe HE is God, i must believe He has it in control! so often i can't seem to control certain parts of my life...in these moments, i see my great need for Him and that i'm not meant to. i am such a planner and i want to know what my future will look like and where it will take me...the Lord has reminded me that it's not my job to map out my life but only to be patient and see where He takes me. proverbs 19:21 says "many are the plans in the heart of a man, but it is the lord's purpose that prevails". this verse has brought me to my knees on countless occasions this semester because i find myself clinging so closely to my desires and plans but knowing that i must submit and trust that the Lord will once more prove true. He holds me close and reminds me of that so often.

i've had the opportunity to dig into david platt's "radical" this semester. talk about a challenging read. our culture truly reflect this "american dream ideal" that is so unhealthy and un-bibilical. through a number of contributing factors i have seen that this is not at all something that i want. i think it is so easy to get caught up in needing the next new thing and living as society deems appropriate...this is such an empty lifestyle. i want my life to be marked by something different. i want to stand out because my faith affects my life that dramatically. i want to live as the bible says and not as i interpret it. i want to give more; i want to serve more; i want to love more. i want to be more consumed by the Lord and let that define me. boy do i have a long way to go!

what a semester...and to try to sum it up in a few brief paragraphs. as i write and reflect these are the things that stick out to me. i have continued to prize the relationships i'm surrounded by and constantly brag that i have the best friends in the world! God has taught me so much, and i know i still have a ton to learn...i look forward to what lies ahead. for now all i can say is war cam eagle, time to go duck hunting :)